Praise be to Allaah.
A son is not doing wrong
if he chooses a woman who is religiously committed and of good character,
for this is the advice of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him) with regard to marriage. It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may
Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) said: “A woman may be married for four things: her
wealth, her lineage, her beauty or her religious commitment. Choose the one
who is religiously committed, may your hands be rubbed with dust [i.e., may
(Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 4802; Muslim, 1466)
There follows some advice for you and your father from Shaykh
Ibn ‘Uthaymeen, that has to do with your situation.
The Shaykh (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:
The question leads us to offer you two points of advice. The
first point is addressed to your father, if he insists on not allowing you
to marry this woman whom you describe as being of good character and
religiously-committed. What he should do is to give you permission to marry
her, unless he has a legitimate shar’i reason that he knows and can explain
to you so that you will be convinced and your mind will be put at rest. He
should weigh up this matter himself: if his father had refused to let him
marry a woman whose religious commitment and character he admired, would he
not have thought that this was wrong and a suppression of his freedom? If he
would not like his father to do this to him, then how can he let himself do
the same to his son? The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
him) said: “None of you truly believes until he loves for his brother what
he loves for himself.”
It is not permissible for your father to prevent you marrying
this woman for no legitimate shar’i reason. If there is a legitimate shar’i
reason then he should explain it to you so that you will understand.
With regard to the advice which we give you, we say that if
you can forget about this woman and marry another, thus pleasing your father
and avoiding a split (between you and your father), then do that.
If you cannot do that, because you are emotionally attached
to her and you are also afraid that if you propose marriage to another woman
that your father may also prevent you from marrying her – because some
people may have envy or jealousy in their hearts even towards their
children, so they do not let them have what they want – I say that if this
is the case and you cannot be patient and forget about this woman to whom
you feel emotionally attached, then there is no sin on you if you marry her,
even if your father objects. Perhaps after you get married he will become
convinced and the feelings in his heart will go away. We ask Allaah to
enable you to do that which is in the interests of both.
Fataawa Islamiyyah, 4/193-194
And Allaah knows best.