Praise be to Allaah.
This question requires that we offer advice to both of you. Firstly, to
your father, who you say is preventing you from marrying this girl whom you describe as
religious and well-mannered. He has to allow you to marry her, unless he has some
legitimate Islamic reason, which he should explain to you to convince you and put your
mind at rest. He should also put himself in your shoes: if his own father prevented him
from marrying a religious and well-mannered girl whom he liked, would he not feel
resentful about this denial of his freedom? If he would not like his father to do such a
thing to him, how can he do this to his son? As the Prophet
(peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) said: “None of you truly believes until he likes for his brother
what he likes for himself.”
It is not right for your father to prevent you from marrying this girl
with no legitimate Islamic reason. If there is a reason, he should explain it to you so
that you will understand what is going on.
Our advice to you is this: if you can possibly change your mind and
find another girl to marry, in order to please your father, maintain family unity and
avoid division, then do so.
But you may find that you cannot do that, because your heart is
attached to this girl, and you cannot bear the thought of marrying anyone else. You may
also be afraid that if you choose another girl, your father might object to that marriage
too, because some parents may try to force their son to marry a relative, or a woman whose
qualities the father likes but the son does not. Some parents may feel jealousy or envy
even towards their own children, so they prevent them from doing what they want to do. If
this is the case, then there is no sin on you if you marry her, even if your father
objects. Perhaps after you are married, your father may change his mind. We ask Allaah to
help you make the right choice.
Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen, Fataawaa Islamiyyah, vol. 4, p. 193